Breathe
Today is a very hard post but I feel I need to make it.
My mother passed away Sunday afternoon peacefully. Watching her struggle to breathe over the last few days broke my heart. Watching her grow weaker and weaker tore my heart out. My mom had a long life and deserved so much more than what her life handed her. Making her smile or laugh during her final days filled me with her love. Our last conversation was a very happy conversation about me getting my girls to come see her. She smiled, laughed and gave a thumbs up. My mom was a very special lady and over the last few days I realized even more how special she was. If I could have had five more minutes I would have called my hubby and had him bring the girls down on Saturday. If I had had five more minutes I would have rubbed more lotion on her hands telling her about the girls and how much Natalie is like me and she is giving me more grief than I ever gave her as a child. I would have done my mom's hair again in a pebbles ponytail that made her laugh the first night I helped the nurse give her a bath. I would have read another psalm to her or just sat and held her hand five more minutes. I would have showed her more pictures on my computer of the girls. I would have helped her sip more water from a straw or syringe defying the nurses orders each time. I would have just loved to have sat next to her in bed as she was sleeping, holding her hand.
What I wouldn't give to have just five more minutes of her time.
My mom was an extrodinary woman and in the words of my oldest daughter -
I am not sure that I am going to get through this week or not. I am really struggling hourly. I am praying that I can celebrate my mom's life and give her the dignity that she deserved!!!!
My mother passed away Sunday afternoon peacefully. Watching her struggle to breathe over the last few days broke my heart. Watching her grow weaker and weaker tore my heart out. My mom had a long life and deserved so much more than what her life handed her. Making her smile or laugh during her final days filled me with her love. Our last conversation was a very happy conversation about me getting my girls to come see her. She smiled, laughed and gave a thumbs up. My mom was a very special lady and over the last few days I realized even more how special she was. If I could have had five more minutes I would have called my hubby and had him bring the girls down on Saturday. If I had had five more minutes I would have rubbed more lotion on her hands telling her about the girls and how much Natalie is like me and she is giving me more grief than I ever gave her as a child. I would have done my mom's hair again in a pebbles ponytail that made her laugh the first night I helped the nurse give her a bath. I would have read another psalm to her or just sat and held her hand five more minutes. I would have showed her more pictures on my computer of the girls. I would have helped her sip more water from a straw or syringe defying the nurses orders each time. I would have just loved to have sat next to her in bed as she was sleeping, holding her hand.
What I wouldn't give to have just five more minutes of her time.
My mom was an extrodinary woman and in the words of my oldest daughter -
"Grammy was a wonderful person mom who deserves to be celebrated and we need to Praise God that she is resting with him now."
I am not sure that I am going to get through this week or not. I am really struggling hourly. I am praying that I can celebrate my mom's life and give her the dignity that she deserved!!!!
posted by B at 18:26
11 Comments:
I'm so sorry to hear this. Please know that I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Good luck with everything.
emily
I'm so sorry. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Rolana
I'm sorry to hear this. I had the same experience about my mom passing away four years ago. I know it's tough but I pray that God will grant you His calming peace that you'll be able to get through this. God bless you.
God Bless you and your family. I will keep you all in my prayers.
Bonnie, my prayers are with you and your family.. Be strong.. celebrate her life and all she gave to so many ppl... I am oh so sorry dear friend.. lean on God..He's there, you know that... BIG HUGS TO YOU
I'm so sorry you lost your mom. She sounds like an extraordinary woman. You and your family will be in my prayers.
I am sorry to hear about your mom, and you are in my prayers as well. I lost a good friend last July and while we had a great last day together, its just not the same.
You and your family are in my prayers.
I'm going to go over to my parents house right now and spend 5 minutes telling them how much I love them. Thank you for the gentle reminder.
Hi, my name is Betty and I know how you feel I lost my mom Dec. 17,2005 she was only 61. My mom was diabetic and after removing her leg she shld have gotten better, but they think it was a blood clot that killed her in her sleep. She didn't even know what happen. I miss her so much, people say talk to her, but I get so mad because I want to physically see her and talk to her. But if that weren't enough in Feb. 06 my grandmother passed away in her sleep. And if that was still enough our only son got stationed in Saudi Araiba for his first tour. And if that still was not enough, I lost my grandfather 1 1/2 weeks ago. Sometimes it feels as though I can't breath, but I do. As hard as it is. I won't lie to you, it hasn't gotten easier for me. I guess you just learn to accept. Please just take a breath at a time and I promise you the next one gets easier. My prayers are with you always. I too wish I had 5 more minutes with my mom. I miss her dearly. May god bring you all the peace in the world. Betty J
Bonnie, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Blessings to you and your family.
prayers have been sent up for you and your family. What amazing insight your little girl has for praising God that your mom is there with him. {{{HUGS}}}
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